The Service

Sandy, a good pal of ours since we have been in Singapore, was a real superstar by agreeing to be the celebrant on 22 July. And she did a fantastic job.

Here's the service that Sandy gave:

SANDY

Good afternoon. It gives me great pleasure to welcome you all on this special day.

My name is Sandy. I am good friend of the couple standing here in front of me. And I have the pleasure of leading today’s ceremony.

To ensure a more personal & memorable occasion for everyone, Damian and Sarah have actually written today’s proceedings.

This is the first time that they have ever tackled anything like this and it’s also my debut as a celebrant. So we do hope that you’ll go easy on the three of us!

Above all, they want you, whatever your beliefs to feel comfortable and to enjoy today. Which is all about celebrating Damian and Sarah’s wedding.

For, as the author, George Elliot, asked many years ago : “What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined together to strengthen each other in all labour, to minister to each other in all sorrow, to share with each other in all gladness, to be one with each other in the silent unspoken memories?”

Before I forget, Damian and Sarah have asked me to thank each and every one of you for taking the time and effort to be here.

Many of you have travelled great distances to be part of today. I gather that some of you have flown in from the US, Mexico, Taiwan, Thailand and, of course, the UK.

So thanks to you all again. And don’t forget to claim those Air Miles!

As you’re probably all aware, Damian and Sarah fulfilled the legal requirements of their marriage on Thursday, in the Botanic Gardens, over in Singapore.

It was a lovely day. The bride wore white, the groom was nervous and the bride’s mother cried. So probably not too different from today then!

So today, Damian and Sarah wish to share with all of you, their family and friends, the happiness that is theirs.

They will dedicate themselves, in our presence, to the continued happiness and well-being of each other. There will also be the symbolic exchanging of rings.

Marriage, if it is to be fulfilling and enduring for both partners must be a co-operative venture.

It is a relationship based on love, respect and a determination on the part of both husband and wife to recognise and adjust to each other’s needs, temperaments and moods – in health or sickness, in joy or sadness, whether the going be easy or hard.

If good humour and a sense of perspective are added to these qualities, then you have the essential ingredients for a successful and fulfilling marriage.

I would now like to invite Clare up with some more words on what makes a good marriage.

CLARE

“What makes a good marriage” by Wilfred Arlon Peterson.
A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the little things are the big things...
It is never being too old to hold hands,
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day,
It is never going to sleep angry,
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives,
It is standing together and facing the world,
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family,
It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways,
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget,
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow,
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful,
It is not only marrying the right person, it is being the right partner

SANDY

Marriage joins two people who trust the love that they have found.

It is a partnership in which each can be confident that the other will love them for what they are, enabling them to grow whilst respecting each other’s needs.

Both giving and receiving are fundamental to marriage and, like confidence, they work in unison.

And confidence comes from the knowledge that your partner will always be there for you.

So, with a reading on being there for one another, I’d like to invite up Tania.

TANIA

“I will be here” by Stephen Curtis Chapman
Tomorrow morning if you wake up and the sun does not appear, I will be here

If in the dark, we lose sight of love, hold my hand, and have no fear, because I will be here

I will be here, when you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak your mind,
I will listen
And I will be here

When the laughter turns to cryin',
Through the winning, losing and trying,
We'll be together
I will be here

Tomorrow morning, if you wake up and the future is unclear, I will be here
Just as sure as seasons were made for change,
Our lifetimes were made for these years
So I will be here

SANDY

Apparently, Damian wanted to add a caveat to that last reading. That if he wasn’t there, he would be on a golf course somewhere – but Sarah soon pointed out how wrong that was!

And with some advice on what to say when you are in the wrong, or even in the right, I’d now like to invite Damian’s sister, Laura, up.

LAURA

"Advice" by Ogden Nash
To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you’re wrong, admit it;
Whenever you’re right, shut up.

SANDY

Thank you for that Laura.
On the subject of keeping love brimming, as Walter Rinder once said:

“Love is not just looking at each other and saying “You’re wonderful” there are times when we are anything but wonderful. Love is looking out in the same direction, it is linking our strength to pull a common load, it is pushing together towards the far horizons, hand in hand”.

As Damian & Sarah stand here hand in hand, we come now to the central part of the ceremony, where Damian & Sarah will express their commitments to each other.

DAMIAN

Sarah, I choose you, to be my wife. To respect you in your successes and in your failures. To care for you in sickness and in health. And to grow with you, throughout the seasons of life.

SARAH

And I choose you, Damian, to be my husband. To respect you in your successes and in your failures. To care for you in sickness and in health. And to grow with you, throughout the seasons of life.

DAMIAN

And I also promise to put my dirty washing in the linen basket and not to clean my football boots or golf shoes in the kitchen sink. And, of course, to love you always.

SARAH

And I also promise to always care for you, unless the injury was self inflicted and involved alcohol, and to accept your bad habits as being part of what makes you loveable.

SANDY

And now, onto the wedding rings!

The wedding ring is a never ending circle;
A symbol of wholeness, oneness and togetherness
And in the circle of your rings
Lies a symbol of your love and strength for one another.

Your two rings look both inwards to each other and outwards to the outside world, including your family and friends gathered here today.

Mark, can I have the rings please?

MARK – GIVES RINGS TO SANDY & SARAH – PASSES BOUQUET TO HOLLY

DAMIAN

Sarah, with this ring I promise to love, honour and respect you and bring happiness and laughter into our marriage.

SARAH

Damian, with this ring I promise to love, honour and respect you and to bring happiness and laughter into our marriage.

SANDY

Damian and Sarah, I know that everyone here, and those that could not make it, will want to join me in offering you our heartfelt, best wishes.

We wish you luck in the future but, more importantly, hope that you continue to have love, friendship and trust from one another.

And may you continue to find the strength to put the effort into your relationship to keep it blooming and healthy.

Now, just before we all go off to drink, eat and be merry, Damian and Sarah would like everyone to join them in a little prayer.

You will find the words inside the envelope on your seats:

Girls only:

The moment I wake up
Before I put on my makeup
I say a little prayer for you
While combing my hair, now
And wondering what dress to wear, now
I say a little prayer for you

Everyone:
Forever, forever, you'll stay in my heart
And I will love you
Forever, forever, we never will part
Oh, how I'll love you
Together, together, that's how it must be
To live without you
Would only be heartbreak for me

Boys only:

I run for the bus, dear,
While riding I think of us, dear,
I say a little prayer for you.
At work I just take time
And all through my coffee break-time,
I say a little prayer for you.

Everyone:

Forever, forever, you'll stay in my heart
And I will love you
Forever, forever we never will part
Oh, how I'll love you
Together, together, that's how it must be
To live without you
Would only be heartbreak for me

SANDY

Damian and Sarah, it’s been my pleasure ‘marrying’ you. Enjoy the rest of today, as I am sure that we all will, and our best wishes for the rest of your married lives!

Let the celebrations begin!